BREAKING NEWS!

I have just received word that A&E's bread-n-butter, Dog the Bounty Hunter, aka Duane Chapman, and his son Leland and brother Tim, have all been arrested by US Marshalls in Hawaii! It stems from his apprehension of convicted rapist/murderer Andrew Luster in Mexico in 2003. The Mexican government is apparently having him extradited on kidnapping charges since he didn't have the authority to hunt there. Why this is happening now, and why the US is listening to Mexico is unknown. But one thing is clear: America will not stand while its greatest citizen is wrestled behind bars in a Mexican prison, forced to reenact his greatest takedowns against the prison's greatest Luchador for the amusement of Mexico's president. This shit will not stand. Mexico, you're on warning. Return The Dog or face the Dog's Bite.